AB Trippin'

By Gina

I was wheeling my luggage through the airport when I heard a familiar voice call to me.

"Hey Gina! Over here!"

"Hey Susan! So how are you? Did you get any sleep at all last night?"

"Probably about as much as you! I'm so excited about this California trip, and I'm so glad you invited me to come along!"

"I had frequent flyer miles, so why not use them for a good cause!"

"Is this is good cause? Flying out to LA just to see the Leno show?"

"YES!" we both agreed.

"So what's our schedule?" Susan asked.

"We'll be at my cousin's house tonight, and then we meet KC and Mae for lunch tomorrow, and then it's off to the Leno Show! Yes! Yes! Yes! We've finally gonna do it!"

"Yeah, see him in person!"

"Oh yes!"

"Gee, I hope we can sit up close!" Susan said excitedly. "What I am gonna wear? What are you gonna wear? Should we wear all black? Whadda ya think?"

"Maybe if we wore capes or something like that!" Susan queried.

"Oh, I don't think so. They'd probably throw us out of there!" I laughingly said.

When we arrived, my cousin had a couple of surprises for us. He had somehow gotten us 4 prestige tickets to the Leno show; and showed us a news article about a celebrity auction that was not only taking place the very next day, but also had Antonio articles. And my cousin lent me his car, a black Porsche, so we could drive around in style. Wow, could anything possibly get any better? This was going to be a wonderful weekend!

The next day loomed brightly on the horizon. Susan, Mae, KC and I were about to move in the fast chica lane. We were going to be around the beautiful people. And one in particular. We saw that our mission was clear. Our goal was narrow in scope. We were gonna see him in person. Definitely a Day In Chica Infamy! I was looking forward to a wonderful day!

Susan and I went to the celebrity auction with great expectations and small wallets.

"Awwww, look, look at that, Gina! It's it's an Antonio brown shirt! We gotta get it! We gotta!"

"Oh yeah, and howda we do that?" I said eyeing the high starting price.

"We'll pool our money for it. We'll share it!"

"Share a shirt?"

"Yeah, I'm a lawyer, I'll come up with a pre-shirt agreement complete with visitation rights!" "

"Oh, funnee, Susan!"

"Come on, Gina! Live a little! Let's get it!" I finally gave in. We had a hard fight for the shirt, but we finally wore down a San Diego collector. Our pouting may have helped in this situation. $ 250.00! For a shirt! And a used shirt at that! Well, it was for a good cause. We were both so excited, we told several people all about our great trip, and that we were going to see the previous owner of the shirt that evening! We finally went to pick up Mae and KC , and were they ever impressed with our shirt!

Meanwhile, at a home in Los Angeles, a man was walking through his hallway to the kitchen.

"Melanie! Have you seen my briefcase?"

"Uh, I think I saw it in the den, honey. You might look there." He walked in to see his wife holding the phone on her shoulder and trying to set the table at the same time. Two little girls were fixing something on the counter nearby, the smaller of the two standing on a stepstool. The man looked at Melanie, and glanced over at the two little girls. She paused in her phone conversation and leaned towards him whispering, "They wanted to fix your breakfast. They insisted." Melanie and the man smiled at each other. "I'm sure you'll love it!" "I'm sure I will too!" Melanie hung up the phone, and called out, "Alex, get down here, I've called you 3 times now!", and as she turned around, she nearly ran into Alex.

"Mom, I'm right here, you don't have to yell!" Alex sat down next to the man. He glanced over to the little girls.

"Uh, oh, they're making breakfast again! Antonio, you want me to go get the dog?" The man shot him a sideways glance that said no. The little girls came over to the table with their culinary creations. First he started to drink his juice.

"This is different! What is this?" "We ran outta orange juice, so I put in some tomato juice and chocolate syrup. Isn't it good?" Dakota said.

"It is wonderful!" Then she put down a plate in front of him.

"Now what is this?" he said. "Eggs, with M&M's, and peanut butter" she said as she touched them with her fingers. He could feel a banging on his leg.

"Papa, bears, see the bears!" Stella said. There were gummy bears underneath the eggs.

"Oh, this is so wonderful! My little girls go to way too much trouble for me!" They were both beaming as he happily hugged both Dakota and Stella.

"Antonio, you've got to get Alex and Dakota to school!"

"Yes, I must get going, I have a busy day! I'll call you later from the car, okay?" she said as they kissed each other good-bye. "Oh, Melanie, I almost forgot, have you seen my brown shirt? I couldn't find it."

"Your brown shirt?"

"Yes, my lucky brown shirt! That one I like to wear!"

"Oh yeah, well, I'll see if I can find it!" "Okay, honey, see you later. I love you!"

"I love you, Antonio! Have a wonderful day!" she waved at him and closed the door. The brown shirt. She had given away the brown shirt. She had to get that brown shirt back.

Mae and KC took turns wearing the brown shirt. And KC was more than a little bummed when we convinced her to put it back in the bag when we went to the restaurant for lunch. I mean, this was a first class place, with valet parking, and sometimes big stars came in there! We went in, looked around for big movie stars, didn't see any, and had a nice lunch anyway. The nice man who had previously had gummy bear eggs for breakfast drove up to the restaurant in his very nice black porsche and walked in. He saw his agent waving at him and went over to join him. As the man sat down, he reached into his jacket pocket. "Oh, you know I think I left my wallet out in the car!"

"Oh, don't worry about it, Antonio, I'll take care of lunch." Just then, Mae, KC, Susan and I walked out of the ladies room, paid our bill, and asked the valet to get our car. It was turning out to be a wonderful day. First up was some high-class window shopping, and then, on to the show!

Melanie, with Stella in tow, walked in to the celebrity auction.

"Oh, Ms. Griffith, we just sold your husband's shirt earlier today! It got a wonderful price!"

"I'm glad to hear that. But, do you know who bought it?"

"Uh, two girls, who said they were going to see your husband on Leno, I think it was, tonight?"

"Yes, he's going to be there. Do you remember their names?"

"They paid by check, I believe, but we just took all the money for the morning to be deposited. I think the person's name on the check was Gina, yes, that's right.

"Ok, well, thank you."Melanie said. "Well, Stella, after we pick up Alex and Dakota here in the little while, we'll go down to the Leno show and see your papa!"

"Antonio, I've gotta run. I'll take the bill and pay it, and I'll talk to you again about this new picture in a couple of days." Antonio lingered over his cigarette a few minutes, and had the valet bring around his car. He looked through the rearview mirror to see packages and bags strewn all over the back seat. And then he looked down at the keyring. It was a Zorro keyring with a bunch of strange keys hanging off it. This wasn't his car. The valet had given him the wrong car! He immediately turned around and drove quickly back to the restaurant. The valet had already given his car, he said, to four girls.

"I think they were going shopping, Mr. Banderas. I think they were said they were going to Rodeo Drive." Mr. Banderas quickly drove away thinking to himself.

"They're going shopping to Rodeo Drive. My wallet is in that car. My briefcase is in that car. My clothes for the show are in that car. I've got to find those girls!"

Susan, KC, Mae and I were happily on our way to Rodeo Drive, when the car's phone rang. I answered it.

"This is Antonio Banderas. I want you to tell me where you are. You have my car!" I laughed.

"Gee, who is this? Hey, guess who's on the phone? It's Antonio!" We all laughed.

"Ha! Ha! Very funny Joe!" and I hung up. "My cousin is so funny. You know what, he even sort of sounded like him!" I laughed. The phone rang again.

"Here, Mae, why don't you answer it this time?"

"So, uh, you're who, now? Antonio? You wanna know where we are? Uh, where are we Gina?"

"Oh, just tell him we're on the great Antonio Banderas Highway of life!" We all laughed as Mae hung up the phone.

"You know, you're cousin is really good. He did sort of sound like him" Mae said laughing.

And the phone rang again. KC leaned forward from the back seat. "Hey, let me talk to him this time!"

"Hello, Antonio? We're on our way to see you! It won't be long now! Huh, what's that? Hey, I can't understand him, he's talking so fast. It sounds like rapid-fire Spanish! You're what? You're going to do what to us?' KC made a face at us, and finally hung up the phone amid our laughter.

"Your cousin is so funny. He speaks really great Spanish!"

The phone rang yet again, and Susan happily answered.

"Hello. Who? Antonio? Funny you should ask, no, he isn't here, but we're going to see him this afternoon!" She turned to us puzzled. "I don't know who that was. Some lady calling for Antonio."

Mae spoke up from the back. "Well, maybe it was Melanie!" We all laughed in agreement.

Just then, the phone rang and this time Mr. Banderas picked up the line.

"Hello." he said.

"Hello? Who is this" the voice asked. "Well, who is this?" Mr. B. asked.

"Is Gina there?" the voice asked. "No, she isn't here."

"Who is this?" the voice asked again.

"This is Antonio Banderas, and I think this Gina has my car and I have her car."

"Her car? Her car? I don't know who you are, but you're driving my car, buddy. And where is my cousin?"

"I was trying to explain to you"

"Oh right, you're Antonio Banderas?" the voice said.

"Yes"

"Well, we'll just see about that, Mr. Banderas!" and he hung up. And immediately called the police.

"Hey, I wanna put on the brown shirt again!" said KC. "Whadja do, Gina, put it in the trunk?"

"Yeah, I guess I did" I said. "Well, we're going on Rodeo Drive here in a second, KC, we'll worry about the shirt later."

"Yeah, I guess you're right. Shopping now. Shirt later."

As Antonio Banderas looked through the rearview mirror, he noticed a strange sight. It was a police car right behind him with the lights flashing, and the siren on. He pulled over, and the officers came up to the car.

"Hello" he said smiling. "Yes, sir, would you show us your license and registration, please?"

"Well, uh, I don't have it with me. It's in my wallet. And my wallet is in the other car."

"The other car?"

"Yes, I had a car mix-up. I am Antonio Banderas, and I am on my way to do a television show."

The officers glanced at each other and then at him.

"Well, Mr. Banderas, it seems that we had a call that this car was stolen. And since you don't have any ID, well, I think we will take all this up at the police station."the officer replied as he escorted Mr. Banderas away.

"Wow, are we having the best time, or what?" Susan said. We had just walked in the best stores on Rodeo Drive and couldn't afford to buy a single, solitary thing. But we all agreed it was great just to look at everything.

"And now we're on our way to our final destination!" I said smiling.

We arrived at the studio and found our prestige tickets gave us very close seats to the stage. We were so thrilled. It wasn't going to be long now! I finally got myself situated in my seat when I heard my name called to see the usher in the back.

"What's going on?" Susan said.

"I don't know. I better go see what it is." I walked back to the usher and he handed me a note. It said simply to come to a particular meeting room. The usher pointed out where it was down a hallway, and I walked towards the door completely oblivious to what was on the other side.

"Gina's been gone for a few minutes, I think we should see what's going on." Susan said. Mae and KC agreed and they all went back to look for me.

I opened the door to the meeting room and walked in, the door closing behind me, and I saw no one at all. I didn't know what to do. I turned abruptly and immediately ran into something. Correction. Somebody. I caught my heel on his pants and it caused him to trip and fall. I leaned down to him.

"Oh, sir, I'm so sorry, I didn't see you. Are you all right? Can I help you?" as I turned him to face me. "Antonio? Antonio Banderas? Oh, my goodness, should I get someone?" I was gently holding his hand. And then, the door opened and Susan came through first, accidentally tripping over us. Then came Mae, and she tripped over us as well. Finally, KC came through the door and managed to trip over us too!

"Antonio! That's Antonio!" KC gasped.

"Antonio! You've got Antonio in here! How did you do that?" Mae said breathlessly.

KC crawled over and said "Wow, how'd you get him down on the floor so fast?"

"Oh, real funny, KC, he might be hurt, get over here and help me "KC. KC. KC!" KC was just sitting on the floor stunned. I turned to Mae.

"There's some water over there, bring me some in a cup. Mae, Mae?" Mae too was sitting and just staring at him.

"Susan, quit staring at him and get over here and help me. Susan!" I reached over and pulled her by the arm. "Didn't you say you knew CPR?"

"Well, I've seen it done." "Close enough!" I exclaimed as I brought some water over. Susan turned to me.

"Well, maybe we should loosen something first." "Loosen something?" "Well, yes, make him more comfortable."

"He won't know he's more comfortable. Susan, get down there and help him!"

I turned towards Mae and KC. They both still looked thunderstruck. Susan finally leaned down over him and brought her mouth down to his mouth. She took a deep breath and turned her head to look at me as I gently rubbed his wrists.

"Susan, you can do this. Think of the chicas!" She slowly turned back to him and gently brought her mouth down to his mouth. He moaned a little, and opened his eyes. He looked first at Susan, and then at me. Susan and I smiled down at him. But he wasn't smiling back. He started to try and get up, and Susan was trying to help him when he pushed her arm away. I had turned away for just a second to get the water behind me on the floor, and when I brought it back around, when he had pushed Susan away, well, it caused me to spill water all over him. And when our eyes met, I could plainly see that he was mad. At me. And wet, too. He finally spoke. "Gina, right?"

"Yes, I'm Gina."

"All right, where is it?"

"Where is what?"

"Where is what?" he said angrily. "Don't play games with me! What did you do with my car? And my wallet? And my briefcase? And my clothes?"

"Huh, I don't know what you're walking about, Mr. Banderas."

"Yes, and you were rude, too!"

"Rude, how was I rude, I've never talked to you before!"

"Oh yes, you have, you hung up on me today!"

"What?"

"I called you today in the car and you hung up on me!"

"That was YOU?"

"Yes, that was me."

"Uh, uh, oh, Mr. Banderas?" Mae spoke up. "I, I hung up on you, Mr. Banderas!"

"Hey!" KC called out. "I had my share of hang up time with you too, Mr. Banderas!"

He turned to look at Susan. "I suppose you hung up on me too!" She never got a chance to answer.

"I can't believe it. You took my car and I was hauled off to prison! You got my wallet and I know you went shopping with it on Rodeo Drive. And you've got my briefcase, and there's an important script in it! Did you know I had to call my agent to get me out of prison! Huh? Did you! Well, did you?"

"Script? Is is a good part, Mr. Banderas? Will we like it?" Mae said.

"Will you like it? Will you like it? Who cares if you like it!"

"Why, we will, Mr. Banderas, we're your most devoted and loving fans in the whole world!" KC exclaimed.

"DEVOTED! LOVING! My enemies would treat me better! This has been a terrible day! You're all in big trouble. I think I'm going to sue you. That's it, sue you!. For something! Anything! I'll think of something!" His tirade continued, mainly in really rapid Spanish. It was just as well that we didn't know what he was saying. The door opened, and in walked Melanie. Mr. Banderas stopped his tirade long enough to see her walk in.

"Melanie, these, these, these women are killing me! Do you know what they've done to me?" I was at that time trying to get to the door.

"Hey, hey, hey, hey, wait, wait, wait, WAIT, that's her Melanie, that's Gina, she's their ringleader." He was now looking directly at me. "You're in trouble now, Gina!"

Melanie walked over to me, smiling and friendly, and said, "Hi! Was it you I talked to on the phone today?" Susan raised her hand,

"No, Melanie, it was me." Antonio interruped. "So, Melanie, I see they hung up on you too!" Melanie was unfazed and still smiling.

"I understand you've got the brown shirt. I'd like to talk to you about buying it back. You see, I accidentally…" She was interrupted by Antonio.

"BROWN SHIRT!" he roared. "THEY'VE GOT MY BROWN SHIRT TOO! AND YOU'RE GOING TO BUY MY OWN SHIRT BACK!" Melanie turned to me, completely calm and pleasant.

"Would you excuse us for just a few minutes?"

Susan sat in the window seat of the plane happily watching clouds go by. I was so depressed. I thought it had been a terrible trip. Susan had talked me into giving Melanie the shirt back. KC and Mae didn't seem to care that we never got to see the show. And neither did Susan. KC was ecstatic that she had hung up on Antonio Banderas. And Mae was thrilled that Antonio had yelled at her. Susan was transfixed with the thought that she had nearly kissed him. For some reason, I couldn't muster up a vicarious thrill from tripping him and knocking him to the floor. Or throwing water on him.

I dragged myself home and threw my luggage on the floor. I knew I would have to give a full report to the chicas, but I couldn't face the comment board. I turned to the mail instead.

There was one large brown lumpy envelope, with strange handwriting, from California. I opened it and out fell the BROWN SHIRT. There was a note attached to it.

"Dear Gina, We decided to give you the shirt back, since you did pay for it. I wanted to let you know that Antonio is perfectly fine, and that he knows that everything that happened last Friday was just an unfortunate set of circumstances. If you ever come back to California to visit your relatives, please be sure and let us know." Melanie had signed it, but there was a different handwriting after the last sentence, "please be sure and let us know---SO WE'LL BE SURE NOT TO BE HERE." And then after that was written, "Gina, please forgive me for my little bromazo" It was signed. "Antonio".

I threw the note up in the air and started to laugh. And laugh. And laugh. And then I picked up the shirt and put it to my nose and inhaled deeply and then put it on. I suppose I should have talked about it on the comment board right away. And I guess I should have told Susan and Mae and KC about the shirt right then. But they were happy. Mae and KC had hung up on him. Susan had almost kissed him. And I was finally happy too. I promised myself to exclusively wear the shirt just for the rose garden! And I always keep my promises!