I sat in the darkened room, wondering what was going to happen next. I kept looking at my watch. Where was my therapist? He was really late. Didn't he realize how desperate I was to talk to someone about this… problem? This obsession? The jealousy I felt? Dammit, where was he? I only had an hour and he was already ten minutes late.
I stood up and started pacing. I went to the shaded window and started to open the blinds when I heard the creak of a door behind me. I turned. A very young man stood next to the door. He looked me up and down, and had a little smirk on his face. His dark eyes and unruly hair was so familiar. I knew him, but who was he? The name escaped me. He sauntered into the room. I stared at him, and he had the same careless smirk on his face. He spoke as he walked toward me.
"Well, chica. Dr. Leal has informed me about your… situation. I suppose he told you that your case is not all that unusual here. I have to say though, after considering your case I think we have a different situation than the one that meets the eye."
"What do you mean? I told Dr. Leal all about it. All the chicas want to kiss Miguel. And I want him all to myself. I don't want all of those other kiss fantasies to be with anyone but me. That's all there is to it. I want him for me. I know you. What is your name?"
He came over to the window where I stood. His hand reached up and caressed my hair. I turned away to look out the window once more.
"I am Louis. Yes you know me. I am like Miguel in many ways. And I see through you. You think it is only jealousy for his popularity. But you know… I think you can be enticed to forget about Miguel. I think, for instance, you might forget Miguel for me, right now."
He kissed my neck, and turned me around to face him. His eyes looked me over again, carelessly undressing me in his mind. I felt a shiver run up my spine. I watched his lips, as he mumbled something in Spanish. His arms tightened around me and his lips brushed mine, gently then harshly, more insistently. He pulled my body close to his, and I could feel the heat of him. I felt like I was melting in his arms.
Suddenly he let go. I almost fell. He looked at me and laughed. "Yes. You see? My diagnosis was correct. Now we must talk about this. Do you mind if I smoke? Not that I care whether you do or not."
He pulled out a cigarette and lit it with a lighter that looked like a tiny pistol. He took a long drag, then blew the smoke in my face. I coughed and turned away from him. He laughed.
"Gee, thanks. So now, you have confirmed your diagnosis. What are you going to do to help me? What can I do?"
"Chica. Chris. What do you want me to say? That Miguel will save himself for you? You know how many others crave his kisses. You have to forget this possessiveness."
"But, Louis, I can't! I think about him all the time. I even dream about him."
"All the time, eh? How many times have you written kiss stories with Miguel?"
"Um… Well, I wrote one, then I also kissed him in my story with Annie."
"You call that devotion? Look at JoAnn and the good Doctor. Or Deena and Nestor. Now that's devotion. What have you done? You have kissed… Why, your first kiss wasn't even Miguel. It was Che! And then your encounter in the airport, but only after you kissed Ahmad, and el M. So where is your loyalty? Hmmm??"
"But, Louis, JoAnn and Deena have kissed other characters…"
"Yes, but they always come back to their first loves, don't they. And you. You have kissed let's see… Armand, and Ricky and Antonio himself, and N… no that was someone else. You have even kissed characters that only made you THINK of him. What do you expect of Miguel, if you are going to wander from kiss to kiss. You are shameless. You want to kiss them all. Admit it. Look at what just happened here."
I hung my head with shame. I whispered, "You are right. I have been unfaithful to Miguel. But…"
"No, no, no! Don't try to make excuses! You know it's true. So my prescription is that you share Miguel, since you have no choice in the matter. And you must write a kiss for Tony and Marcos and that other Miguel that you crave, and Francisco, and Nestor and well you get where I am going. Maybe one day you will even want to write one for me."
"I don't know, Louis. Maybe we need to go over that part of my therapy again."
"Anything to help a patient."
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