Choosing to Survive

By Susan J.

I knew that Luis had checked me out of the hotel so I couldn't go back the same one. I found another hotel a few streets away. I got off the horse and a liveryman from the hotel took the horse to the stables. I walked as quickly and painlessly as I could to the front desk. The hotel clerk at the counter walked over to me.

"Yes, Senorita, may I help you?" he said.

"Yes. I need a room please."

"Yes, of course. How long will you be staying?"

"One or two days."

He filled out the registration book.

"Your name, please."

"Rebecca Rodriguez."

He wrote it down.

"Do you have any luggage?"

"No, it was lost, but I do have a horse in your livery stable."

"Oh, I'm sorry about your luggage."

"Thank you, perhaps you can tell me if there is a dressmaker nearby?"

"Yes, her shop is just a few doors down. I can have one of our house maids take you there if you like?"

"That would be very kind but for now I would like to go to my room and rest a bit."

"Yes of course."

He rang the bell on the counter and one of the bellmen came over. He handed the man the key to the room.

"Please show Senorita Rodriguez to her room."

"Si, Senor," said the bellman.

We walked up the stairs to my room. The bellman opened the door and stepped aside so that I could walk in.

"If you need anything please don't hesitate to ask, Senorita."

"Thank you."

I tipped him and he left. I closed the door behind me and hobbled over to the sofa and sat down. I was thankful that my ankle was not hurting as much as it did before. I decided to rest so I went into the bedroom to rest for a while.

Luis arrived in town later that night and went straight to the hotel where we first met. He went over to the counter and the clerk walked over to him.

"Good evening, Don Luis," said the clerk.

"Good Evening."

"What can I do for you, Senor?"

"A guest by the name of Rebecca Morales checked out a few days ago and I am wondering if she happened to check back in?"

"Let me check the register."

The clerk looked through the book but couldn't find the name.

"No, I'm sorry, Don Luis, but she did not check back in."

"Thank you."

"Por nada, Senor."

As Luis turned to leave the hotel he saw a friend of his walking over to him.

"Buenas Noches Luis," Alberto said.

"Buenas Noches Alberto, como estas?" Luis said.

"Muy buien, muy buien. Y usted?"

"I'm doing just fine thank you. What are you doing in town? Come to retrieve a run away horse?"

Luis looked at him strangely.

"A run away horse?" Luis asked.

"Yes. I just saw one of your horses in the livery stable for the Hotel Havana."

"One of my horses is missing. I think I had better see if it's mine. Thank you Alberto."

"You're welcome. It was good to see you again, Luis. Next time we'll sit down and have drink."

"Yes, we will."

They shook hands and Luis left. He walked over to the hotel's livery stable. He looked around and found his horse in one of the pens. The caretaker walked over to Luis.

"Excuse me," Luis said.

"Si Senor? What can I help you with?" said the caretaker.

"This horse here," Luis pointed towards the horse.

"Si Senor?"

"Did you see who rode it in?"

"Si Senor. A woman rode in on him about two hours ago."

"Did she go into the hotel?"

"Si Senor."

"Did you find out her name?"

"No Senor, but I'm sure that hotel clerk will know that."

"Gracias."

Luis handed the man a dollar."

"Gracias, Senor."

Luis walked into the hotel and over to the clerk.

"Can I help you, Senor?" the clerk asked.

"Yes. Can you tell me if you have a guest registered here by the name of Rebecca Morales?" Luis asked.

"Let me check Senor."

The clerk checked the register.

"No I'm sorry Senor there is no one by the name of Rebecca Morales."

"Please check again, she would have a horse in the hotel livery stable."

"There was a woman who came in with no luggage, who did mention that she had a horse in the hotel stable, but her name isn't Morales."

"What is it then?"

"Rebecca Rodriguez."

"What room is she in?"

"Room 242."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome, Senor."

Luis went up the stairs to the second floor and walked down the hall until he found the room. He knocked on the door. I was lying on the bed when I heard the knock, I got up and walked to the door and opened it. To my surprise on the other side of the door there stood Luis.

"Luis, what are you doing here?" I asked.

"That is what I should be asking you, Rebecca. May I come in?" Luis asked.

"Yes, please come in."

Luis walked into the room and I closed the door behind us.

"Now to ask you what you just asked me, what are you doing here?" Luis asked.

"I couldn't take advantage of your hospitality for one more day."

"You were doing no such thing. What is the real reason that you left?"

I sat on the sofa. Luis knew that something was wrong, he walked over and sat by me.

"Rebecca, please tell me what's wrong."

"I can't involve you in my problems Luis."

"Please let me try and help you."

"No one can help me Luis, there are only two choices that I have in order to find the solution to my problem."

"What two choices?"

"Either I keep running for the rest of my life in order to survive or they find and kill me and I choose to survive."

I got up from the sofa and walked towards the window. Luis sat for a few seconds longer then he got up and walked over to me.

"What are you talking about? Who would want to hurt you?" Luis asked.

"My husband's family."

"Why would they want to hurt you?"

"They blame me for the death of my husband."

"Did you have something to do with his death?"

I looked at him with tears in my eyes.

"No Luis. As God as my witness I didn't kill him, even though I wanted to, I didn't kill him."

"Why would you want to kill him?"

"He would…"

I covered my face with my hands. Luis touched my arm tenderly.

"What would he do?"

"He would beat and degrade me. The last time he beat me I was pregnant, and because of the beating I lost the baby. His family said that I did something to myself to make me lose the baby and when I told them what had really happened, they didn't believe me. Three days later my husband was dead."

"How did he die?"

"He was involved in a poker game, and from I was told he was cheating. He was shot for it. He was still alive when he arrived home, but he died shortly after. When his family found out what had happened, they blamed me for shooting him."

"Did you explain what had happened?"

"Yes, I tried with every breath in my body, but no one would listen. They claim that I wanted his money, but I told them I didn't, I had money of my own from my family and that I didn't need his. They swore that if I left town that they would not rest until they caught up with me and brought me to justice, but their kind of justice. Now do you understand why I had to leave your house and why I can't accept your help?"

I walked away from him and sat back on the sofa and started crying. Luis sat by me and hugged me tightly.

"I want to help you Rebecca, please let me," Luis said.

"No Luis, I can't let you do that; besides we hardly know each other and even if we knew each other for an entire lifetime I would still forbid you from helping me."

Luis smiled at me.

"You would forbid me. That is the first time that a woman has ever said that to me."

"I mean it, Luis."

"Oh I know you do, but when I make up my mind to do something there is nothing that can stop me."

He touched my face. "And when I want something there is nothing that can stop me from getting it," he said.

I looked into his eyes and I felt my heart start to beat faster.

"Luis, I appreciate that you want to help me but I can't let…"

He kissed me tenderly and ran his fingertips down my neck. I shuddered at his touch. He looked into my eyes and I touched his cheek. Luis stood up and extended his left hand to me, I took it and he helped me up. He pulled me into his arms and kissed me more passionately this time, I ran my fingers through his hair and he started kissing my neck.

"Luis, we can't do this," I said.

"Why not? We're both adults."

"We are not married to each other. How will it look if someone finds out that we're up here alone?"

"No one will care because they are doing the same thing."

We started laughing.

"How is your ankle feeling?" Luis asked.

"It's much better, thank you."

"Well, I think you should keep off of it."

Suddenly he picked me up in his arms and carried me into the bedroom. He gently sat me on the edge of the bed then he slowly took off my shoes. He took off his jacket, and then I reached out and pulled him towards me by his shirt. He took off his shoes and I unbuttoned his shirt and then undid his belt, I slowly unbuttoned and gently pulled down his pants and before I knew it, there stood Luis without a stitch of clothing on him. As I looked at him I couldn't help thinking what a beautiful body this man had. I ran my hands over his chest feeling as much of him as I could. Luis smiled at me as I looked at him.

"Now, it's your turn," Luis said.

He pulled me up so that I stood in front of him; he turned me around and he unbuttoned by dress and watched it fall to the floor. He undid the ties of my corset and tossed it onto a chair; little by little my clothes came off. He removed the combs that I had in my hair and watched as my hair fell around my shoulders; he set the combs on the night table. Once he accomplished his task of removing my clothing, he gently laid me on the bed. He lay beside me and stroked my hair, then my cheek; he kissed me gently. I touched his face and he smiled.

"I want you to feel safe, Rebecca," Luis said.

"I am as long as I'm here in your arms."

He kissed me passionately. His tongue parted my lips and entered my mouth, he ran his hand down my shoulder and he started caressing my left breast. I ran my fingers through his thick hair. He slowly dragged his tongue down my neck and towards my chest. Slowly I began to give in more and more to his touch. He moved so that he was almost on top of me, with his right leg he pushed my left leg aside and once he did this he did the same thing with his left leg.

He kissed my breasts and he licked each nipple as if it was candy. I started arching my back with every one of his licks. He kissed my neck, moving upwards until he reached my lips again. I felt that his kisses were getting hotter and hotter. We looked into each other's eyes; I touched his face with both hands and pulled him closer to my lips. He raised my arms above my head and kissed my neck in a ravenous way, while he did this he moved so that he was now on top of me and his bottom torso was between my legs.

We looked into each other's eyes again and as he kissed me on the lips he entered me with such precision that it took my breath away. He began moving in and out, slowly at first, and every time he entered me I dug my nails into his back. He felt so wonderful and with every thrust I felt my body shutter with extreme delight. His movements were becoming faster. In my entire adult life I had never felt the feelings that Luis was making me experience. The kisses that we were sharing were like none I had ever given or received, his touches were soft yet intense and I was loving every minute of it. I kissed his neck and shoulders all the while my legs were wrapped securely around his waist.

"Luis…oh Luis," I said in a breathless tone.

His thrusts became harder and much more intense. I felt like I was about to explode from the feelings that I was having.

"Oh Rebecca..." Luis breathed.

With one final hard thrust Luis ignited an explosion in both of us that was sheer ecstasy. Luis fell on top of me, exhausted, and as he rested I kissed his forehead. Our breathing was labored but content. Luis rolled off to the right of me and I pulled the sheet all the way up so that I covered everything but my eyes. Luis looked at me.

"Are you all right?" he asked.

"I'm just fine."

I started giggling.

"What's so funny?"

"I have never felt this kind of feeling before."

Luis smiled as he pulled down the sheet to expose my face. He moved closer to me until our noses were less than an inch apart.

"Never?" he said.

"Never."

"Well, once we catch our breath, I hope that I can make you feel like that again."

I touched his face.

"I know you can," I said.

He took me in his arms and held me tightly.