El Muerte

By Debel

Antonio stared at David's mother as they stood like Adam and Eve in what seemed to be the Garden of Eden, but suddenly Eve had turned into the serpent. Antonio didn't know what to say to the woman. What could he tell her? That he didn't want to loose trust in the one person who had managed to instill it in him after so many years? He was just beginning to feel comfortable with it and now it was being wrenched away and the unreasoning anger began to grow in him.

Cecile's eyes did not leave his face as she soothed him, "I'm so sorry, darling. I know this must be a shock to you. You obviously care very much about him. We all do. He's such a charming man, after all. The servants have always adored him and petted him shamelessly when he and Jonathan were children. It's such a shame really." She slipped her arm through Antonio's stiff one and they began to move slowly along the path once again. "He would create the most fantastic stories when he was a young boy. Jonathan was always the extrovert and everything seemed to come so easily to him. We thought it was just David's way of getting attention and then the stories got wilder and we could never decipher when he was telling the truth. We came to believe that David no longer knew the truth himself. But, then we separated them and sent them to different schools and it got much better." She sighed and Antonio noted the sharp planes of her face softening and he glimpsed what she must have looked like as a young mother. She looked up at him and he was amazed to see tears swimming in her eyes. "You poor man! You must think me a horrible mother to be saying such things to you, someone who is practically a stranger to me, but I feel a closeness to you already and I could see how much you care for my son." She leaned against him and clutched at his arms. "You do care for him don't you?"

Antonio held her small, trembling body against his. He couldn't help but assure her that he did care for David. She sighed and pressed her face against his shoulder. "I'm so grateful to you, my dear. You must persuade David to attend the family dinner tonight and you must be at his side. Will you do this for me?" Antonio looked into her great eyes, soft in this light and agreed. It would give him a chance to see David and his family together.

When they returned they found David sitting at his father's feet. He turned as soon as he heard them approaching and the look on his face reminded Antonio forcibly of a young boy. It was shinning with happiness and he laughed as he said, "I was beginning to get worried about you two, you were gone a long time!"

Cecile shared a look with Antonio and then moved to stand behind her husband. "You should go inside now, James. You must rest for the dinner tonight. You will have plenty of time to chat some more with David then. Antonio has promised to stay, as well."

David stood and glanced at Antonio, an uncertain look in his eyes. His father clutched at David's hand and said, "How wonderful, David! You'll be with us tonight, just like old times, eh?"

David gazed lovingly down at him and pressed his lips gently on his father's head. "Of course, father. Antonio and I will both stay for dinner." David watched as his father was wheeled into his bedroom and then he turned to Antonio and grinned. "Want to go bicycle riding?"

There were many bicycle trails on the estate and they followed one through the sea oats to a private beach. The ocean breeze blew through their hair and tugged at their clothes as they walked barefoot along the white sand. Antonio reached up and freed his hair, then removed his shirt. He stood facing the Atlantic and then closed his eyes on the great expanse of water rolling toward him and let his head tilt back and his arms open wide to the warmth of the sun.

David moved in front of him and wrapped him in his arms, covering his neck and face in kisses. "God, I love you," he murmured quietly, not even realizing he was saying it aloud.

Antonio's arms went around his shoulders, leaning into the embrace and then they were kissing. It wasn't soft or hesitant, but hungry and sure. Antonio had felt himself filling with the old anger and pain again and David's touch always drove those feelings away. He wanted David to be nothing more than the man he believed him to be. He didn't need any more secrets in his life. He brought his hands to David's head and held it tightly, forcing the other man's mouth wider with his own as he pressed his body against David's. He didn't want to find any lies in David and it became a driving need as if he could search them out with his body.

David began to try and ease the ever more frantic embrace, sensing something had changed and it made him uneasy. He tried to say something, but it was impossible. Finally, he grabbed Antonio's hair and pulled his head back. Fear and passion made his voice ragged, "What's wrong, Antonio? I can feel it in you, tell me!" David's eyes searched Antonio's and he could read it in them so easily. He had seen it before. A light of desperation that burned him with its fire. "Are you thinking about Nicky again? Is that it?" David didn't know if he could bear to hear Antonio call out the other man's name again.

Antonio's eyes opened wide, shocked at the name as if he'd been doused with cold water. "No! God no! Why are you even bringing him up now!" he shouted at David and his cry mingled with that of the sea birds flying high over head. He pushed away and David tried unsuccessfully to bring him close again. "I'm bringing him up because he's never gone. It's as if he's always between us," David was pleading with him to understand.

Antonio glared at him. "He's dead. He can't come between us."

David shook his head. "He already has. You've never stopped loving him. It's him you want not me. Who is it you're thinking of when we're making love Antonio?"

Antonio began to jerk on his shirt. "And who the hell are you thinking of Rubio? Is it me or Tom?" He almost spit the words out and then began to make his way back across the sand to their bicycles.

David quickly overtook him and swung him around. "What the fuck does Tom have to do with any of this? Why are you even......." David paused and a look of realization came into his eyes. "Mother! What's she been telling you?" He grabbed Antonio by the shoulders and attempted to shake him but his grip was easily broken. Antonio's hair blew across his face, but it didn't hide the look of betrayal in his eyes. "It doesn't matter what she told me. What matters is you haven't told me everything I need to know in order to do my job, Rubio."

David stepped back, a worried frown on his face. "But there's nothing else. I've told you everything. Tom and I were lovers, yes, but that ended a long time ago. He has nothing to do with any of this, I swear it!"

They stood quietly staring at each other, letting time stretch out between them and then Antonio finally broke the silence, "Shouldn't we be getting back? We've got a long night ahead of us and I need my rest if Jonathan is going to be at this little family shindig."

The silence and unease between them grew through the rest of the afternoon, even though words were spoken they were of no consequence. There seemed to be no words that could answer all the unspoken questions.

They had been given a bedroom to share close to the orchid garden. Antonio stood framed in the doorway opening onto the portico. The setting sun wasn't visible, but the lavender sky was. David came to stand behind him and grinned as he looked at it. It was exactly the color of 'Mother's' dress. The only thing the evening sky needed was a splash of sequins to finish it off.

"You look beautiful." David said softly. He thought Antonio more beautiful the longer he knew him. They had been given fresh clothes for the informal family gathering. David suspected his own came from Jonathan's closet. The expensive, white silk shirt and black pants fit him perfectly. He had no idea how they managed something for Antonio, but the red shirt set him off very well. There was only one thing which needed to be altered. He reached out and loosened the dark brown hair; so that it fell free and David's grin broadened as he let his fingers run through the silk of it and then he pressed his lips into it. "I like it best like this," he murmured as he wrapped his arms around the warm body in front of him.

Antonio sighed and let himself lean into the embrace, resting against David's solid form. He wasn't in the mood to think about anything, or to worry over secrets or to argue. It felt too good to be held like this. He said, "If the damn stuff gets in my eyes when I need to take a clear shot then it's both our asses."

David chuckled, "I'll risk it. Besides, you're not packing any weapons tonight are you?" He began to move his hands over Antonio's body as if he were searching for something.

Antonio laughed and pressed himself tighter against David. "No, but you seem to be. That or you're just really happy to see me."

"Ohhhh, I'm really happy to see you all right. In fact I'm getting happier by the moment," David said.

Antonio turned in the embrace and bit at David's lower lip as he pushed him back into the room, kicking the door closed behind them. He couldn't go any further into the room, however, because David trapped him against the door and slowly began to work his way down Antonio's body. "Still looking for weapons?" Antonio asked, his eyes closed and his head and shoulders resting against the door and then he moaned loudly, trying to lift his heavy lids enough to see David's face looking up at him, grinning. David said, "You lied. I think I've just found something and it's loaded."

Antonio wanted to laugh but couldn't quite manage anything but another moan as David proceeded to unload his weapon for him.